Dreams and Thoughts

Once I had a dream about making it big in the film industry. That I was a director and a screenplay writer and skilled and well-known for my work. I was respected and praised for what I had accomplished and people eagerly waited the next best thing. It wasn't about the money or the fame, it was the feeling of self-satisfaction that hit me. The bliss of being exactly where I wanted to be. But alas it was only a dream and remains that way for now.

I dream about falling - A LOT. Like from buildings and mountains or tall trees. The uncomfortable moments of having nothing under my feet and then the painful strike of waking so suddenly in a cold sweat.

I used to dream about my past life. It was lots of reoccurring moments and places. Airports, Europe, tiny apartments and what I thought was love. Over time the dreams caught up with reality as though, in a delayed sense of being. It took a full year for the dreams to catch up to the present state of mind. In the dreams I was now unhappy as I was while being awake. It is strange how that works. Happy in the lie or unhappy with the truth? "The blissful cliche."

And last night I seem to remember having a dream about it being winter and being worried about the days getting shorter again...